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The Ballad of Gordon

from Kid Safe by Tom Smith

/

about

This was written for a Fox Kids Canada PSA about racial harmony back in the 1990s. (Near the end you'll hear a small lick which BNL borrowed from Michael Jackson's "Black Or White".) I knew, when I first heard it mumblety years ago, that if I ever did a kids' album I would cover this song. Now I am, and now I am.

The original song, by the way, just fades out to unintelligibility after "I like your hat...", so I finished off the refrain.

lyrics

There was darkness, there was light,
There was day and there was night.
There was wrong and there was right --
And then there was me!

You didn't even know me, but you treated me like dirt
(And then there was me)
You didn't even know me, but you called me a jerk.
(And then there was me)

I'm from a planet near a star
You wouldn't know, it's very far.
They're calling me the man from Mars,
And I think they're insulting me!

(Insulting me)
They tried to take my special suit
(Insulting me)
They said my head looks like fruit -- What is fruit?
(Insulting me)
"Put your hands up or I'll shoot!"
I don't have hands.

Across the galaxy, I flew,
Heard a peaceful message sent by you.
Now I find you're judged by color and size
I can't believe what you call my...

I'se the guy who sails the sky, but I think I'd like to live here.
I'd like to share your mountains, share your trees, and share your rivers.
I've never seen so many beings of so many colors.
I'd like one day for you to say that I could call you brother.

(And then there was we)
I'd like to learn about your pizza and your weather,
(And then there was we)
Then we could learn about how beings live together.
(And then there was we)

So if you're thinking about being a spaceman,
It don't matter if you're black or white!
Or purple or green or blue or red,
Or yellow with polka dots on your head,
Or made of snow, or made of wheat,
Or looking like something that's kind of a treat.
I like your hat, you like green tea,
There was all that...
And then there was me!

credits

from Kid Safe, released November 13, 2015
Words and Music: Ed Robertson and Steven Page

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Tom Smith Ann Arbor

Weird Al with more books, JoCo with more jokes, Carlin with more Cthulhu. Since 1985, Tom Smith has been breaking hearts, minds, and laws of propriety and physics with his insane blend of sf/fantasy, Life With Computers, pop culture, politics, and puns. More than twenty albums later, he maintains the best is yet to come. ... more

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