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Mr. Morden

from For Your Confustication by Tom Smith

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A long-overdue song about Mr. Morden, one of the villains from the series Babylon 5. Morden was played by the excellent Ed Wasser, and man oh man could he do sleazy evil.

lyrics

This is the tale of Mr. Morden,
Mr. Morden is who.
He is the subject of the Shadows,
And the Shadowmen tell what Mr. Morden must do.

Mr. Morden was thin and gaunt,
Kinda creepy, too.
He asked people "What do you want?"
(Vorlons ask "Who are you?")
Mr. Morden was a sneaky devil,
Mr. Morden was,
Mr. Morden is the subject of the Shadows,
And what the Shadowmen says, he does.

Mr. Morden was wracked with guilt,
Mr. Morden's wracked,
Cause his daughter and wife were killed,
Mr. Morden's cracked.
Mr. Morden was crazy,
Mr. Morden was.
Mr. Morden is the subject of the Shadows,
And what the Shadowmen says, he does.

The Shadows are a race that want beings to evolve
And so manipulate them into wars
Morden went to space, seeking problems he could solve,
And ended up as something that he abhors.

Mr. Morden and Londo planned,
Mr. Morden schemed.
Londo's vision was vast and grand,
Everything he dreamed.
Londo fell into darkness
When Idira died,
Mr. Morden framed Rifa for her murder,
That's right, he did it and then he lied.

The war spanned the galaxy,
The Shadows' path was clear,
Too bad for Morden that
Mollari had his Vir.

Morden went to Centauri Prime,
Mr. Morden went,
But Mollari was waiting there,
The Shadows' attack to prevent.
What Mr. Morden heard, he didn't like,
And his head went up on a pike....

Mr. Morden hurt Londo's friends,
Mr. Morden hurt.
This is where Morden's tale ends,
Napping in the dirt.
Mr. Morden was an evil man,
With a complicated evil plan...

... But who says you can't learn to solve
problems nonviolently AND still evolve?
Now the galaxy's peaceful, and Morden's off the grid,
Mr. Morden was a subject of the Shadows,
And what the Shadowmen said... he did!

credits

from For Your Confustication, released September 19, 2017
Music: "The Tale of Mr. Morton" by Lynn Ahrens

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Tom Smith Ann Arbor

Weird Al with more books, JoCo with more jokes, Carlin with more Cthulhu. Since 1985, Tom Smith has been breaking hearts, minds, and laws of propriety and physics with his insane blend of sf/fantasy, Life With Computers, pop culture, politics, and puns. More than twenty albums later, he maintains the best is yet to come. ... more

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