We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.
/

about

I called a Mulligan on this one.

See, my personal rules for iTom were [a] no parodies and [b] the song must be new. However, between a whole buncha Real Life 'n' stuff, I simply didn't have the time to finish up any of the songs I'd been working on.

I also happened to get a good recording of this song at GenCon Indy 2007. Great crowd, fun time.

lyrics

Well, I'm the captain, Mal, my wit is dry,
I may never be a success, but I'm gonna try,
I live by one law: Murphy's -- and you know why, yay-hey,
I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

Well, I'm the first mate, Zoe, I always survive,
Like my career after Cleopatra 2525.
I'm the hottie who'll kick your ass, and you know why, yay-hey,
I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

I'm Zoe's husband Wash, I'm one lucky guy,
I'm also the pilot, so shut up and let me fly,
I'm the comic relief on the wind, and you know why, yay-hey,
I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

I'm Jayne, the hero of Canton, I'm one studly guy,
Don't get on my bad side, or you're gonna die,
Oh yeah -- I don't have a good side, and you know why, yay-hey,
I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

I'm Kaylee the engineer, I know what to do,
I'm the oversexed grease monkey snarky savant Mary Sue,
I'm in lust with Simple Simon, and you know why, yay-hey,
I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

I'm Simon, the doctor, and Jayne gets on my nerves,
If he doesn't shut up, I'll make sure he gets what he deserves:
I'll lock him in a room with my sister, and you know why, yay-hey,
I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

I'm River...
I think...
There's a 29.22% chance that this verse won't scan,
But rewriting it in iambic -- oooh, dancing!

I'm Inara, the Companion, in love with Mal -- who knows why,
He always calls me a whore, I guess he's shy --
And nothing will ever happen, 'cause so am I, yay-hey,
I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah...

I'm Shepherd Book, the token... religious guy,
I've got a great left hook and I think like a spy.
All that Barney Miller paid off, and you know why, yay-hey,
I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly, I'm on Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

Well, I'm Joss Whedon, the creator, yeah, that's me,
The only one to compare is J. Michael Straczynski.
I thank you all for watching Serenity, yay-hey,
Buy my DVD, buy my DVD, buy my DVD.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

I'm Brannon Braga, and I'm the Star Trek guy,
Forty years of franchise, and you can kiss it goodbye,
Joss got it right in one -- I hate that guy, yay-hey,
He did Firefly, he did Firefly, he did Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

Well, now this song is done, time to say goodbye,
It's been a lot of fun, but I've gotta fly,
I've set aside fifteen hours, and you know why, yay-hey,
To watch Firefly, to watch Firefly, to watch Firefly.
Yada-dah-dah-dah-dah....

credits

from iTom 4​.​0: Smith and Legend, released October 26, 2007
Music: "Because I Got High" by Afroman

license

tags

about

Tom Smith Ann Arbor

Weird Al with more books, JoCo with more jokes, Carlin with more Cthulhu. Since 1985, Tom Smith has been breaking hearts, minds, and laws of propriety and physics with his insane blend of sf/fantasy, Life With Computers, pop culture, politics, and puns. More than twenty albums later, he maintains the best is yet to come. ... more

contact / help

Contact Tom Smith

Streaming and
Download help

Shipping and returns

Redeem code

Report this track or account

If you like Tom Smith, you may also like: