H​-​1000

by Tom Smith

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Political commentator and generally awesome human being Jim Wright observed ( goo.gl/YLGzEC ) that, according to the latest conspiracy theories and the "logic" of Trump World, Hillary Clinton could at the very least time travel. He also asked if anyone over there had ever seen the dang Terminator movies. Well, sir, that was enough for me.

A few people have suggested that this could be turned on its head, and adopted as an anti-Hillary Clinton song. I bet that's not gonna happen, but if it does, I'll tell people the truth about it, and -- for now, at least -- American white supremacists' money is as good as anybody else's.

To make sure it's absolutely unquestioned: Yes, I supported (and still support) Hillary Clinton. I voted for her for president. This song mocks not her, but the idiot conservative fascists and conspiracy theorists who hate and fear her so much for being a woman who's outspoken and competent.

lyrics

North Korea’s got the bomb
And Trump knows who to blame,
The pantsuit anti-soccer mom,
Hillary’s her name.

Four years before she got the job,
She made those nukes appear
It took a special orange blob
To make her evil clear

For such a huge, horrific crime
There’s just one way to explain
She must have traveled back through time
And she could do it again!

Hillary’s a terminator
There’s no threat that’s greater
Hillary the terminator

In the not-too-distant future,
Skynet had the plan:
Send back something to ensure
Their conquest of man.

She looks human, but inside
Her heart is cold as stone,
She makes friends commit suicide,
And gets illegal loans.

Her perfect scheme is oh so clear,
So obvious to get --
We hold hearings on her every year,
And we haven't found proof yet!

that
Hillary’s a terminator
Alternative facts incriminate her
Hillary the terminator

So many evil plots that we’ve inves... ti... ga... ted,
We’ve used the same excuses, said she’s im... pli... ca... ted,
But she's still free, though her reputation’s repu... di... a... ted
We’ll never quit, ‘cause otherwise we’ll be sub... ju... ga... ted!

Call her Crooked Hillary,
Never let that go,
We know there’s something out there she
Does not want us to know

That child slavery pizza place
Was only just the tip
Of the iceberg of her disgrace,
Someday she’ll make a slip

Keep in mind her greatest crime,
Seeking power while female --
Wait! Wasn’t this about Kim Jung-Un?
To hell with that! HER EMAIL!

HIllary the terminator
Thank god for our orange dictator
No, she wasn’t the best debator
It’s okay to be a hater
Of Hillary the terminator....

credits

released September 22, 2017
image by Richard Blakeley, used without permission

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Tom Smith Ann Arbor

Weird Al with more books, JoCo with more jokes, Carlin with more Cthulhu. Since 1985, Tom Smith has been breaking hearts, minds, and laws of propriety and physics with his insane blend of sf/fantasy, Life With Computers, pop culture, politics, and puns. More than twenty albums later, he maintains the best is yet to come. ... more

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