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Happy Conception Day

from And They Say I've Got Talent by Tom Smith

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A warm and cuddly greeting from the Republic of Gilead

lyrics

Happy Conception Day, the day your life began,
Another stone that paves the way for God's eternal plan.
You were not yet completely formed, but part of you was whole,
For God so loved the new unborn, He gave to you a soul.

Happy Conception Day, from whence you did begin,
Your blessed life wiping away your parents' mortal sin,
Their act offended Baby Jesus, and can't be condoned,
But, then again, from fallen trees the sharpest spears are honed.

Our nation is in convergence with
The dictates of our creed,
Our moral sense of urgency
Beat women's selfish greed.

We celebrate this resurgence of
Him risen from His tomb,
And, in nine months, your emergence from
The prison of the womb.

Happy Conception Day, your parents' path, abjure,
We hope you follow The One Way, God's love will keep you pure,
And don't forget tradition and our faith will see you through,
For, if you stray, perdition and damnation wait for you.
Amen.

credits

from And They Say I've Got Talent, released November 5, 2004

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Tom Smith Ann Arbor

Weird Al with more books, JoCo with more jokes, Carlin with more Cthulhu. Since 1985, Tom Smith has been breaking hearts, minds, and laws of propriety and physics with his insane blend of sf/fantasy, Life With Computers, pop culture, politics, and puns. More than twenty albums later, he maintains the best is yet to come. ... more

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